Adoption


(Blog Post written 6/14/10)

Why Adoption?

Adoption has been something I have been passionate about for a long time. I have researched, read blogs, and followed many families during their adoption journey. I always knew that I would adopt one day, I just wasn't sure from where or when. I always thought I would be going to China to adopt a little girl, and if I were 30 years old right now, then that is probably where we would be heading. But I'm not, and won't be for 2 more years. So, we decided domestic adoption would be best for us.

A little back story. When we got married, we had talked about how long we wanted to wait to have children. We thought that 5 years would be a good amount of time to wait. Well, after being married for almost 4 year, I got bit by the baby bug. So we decided to start trying on our 4 year anniversary, May 2008. We were going to Mexico for our anniversary, and I had stopped taking birth control at the beginning of May. My plan was to come home from Mexico pregnant. HA! Well, I didn't get too discouraged about not being pregnant for the first 9 months. Andrew was traveling a lot, and we were just "seeing if it would happen." Then in March, 2009 we got serious about trying. By the way, this whole time, none of our family knew that we were trying. So every time I got asked when we were going to have kids, I would just brush it off. I never thought we would have problems, and so after trying for so long, there just wasn't a right time to tell them. By May of 2009, I thought something might be wrong. My sisters never had any problems getting pregnant, why was it taking us so long. Finally in August, I told my parents. Of course they were shocked and committed the situation to prayer. I also told Andrew's parents what was going on. Then, just a few weeks later, I found out I was pregnant! Complete Shock! We only told our immediate family, but we were so excited. Then, not even two weeks later, I miscarried. I was so broken hearted. But everyone saw this as "at least you know you can get pregnant now." Well, that wasn't what I wanted to hear. Andrew and I decided to give it until January, and then look into testing, and our options. The next few months pasted without any pregnancy, and the entire time, I just wanted to be done with it. I wanted to stop trying, and just move on to Adoption. We both knew that was the next step, but Andrew just wasn't ready to move on to adoption yet. He wanted to give trying our full attention. After some trips to the Dr's office, we decided to give it until May 2010. If I wasn't pregnant by then, we would start the adoption process. We decided to forgo any infertility treatment. They are all very expensive, and if we were going to spend a lot of money, we would rather put it towards definitely getting a baby, then just hoping that the procedure works, and possibly getting a baby.

To answer the question, a lot of people are wondering, I don't know if we can have biological children. From everything we can tell, yes, we should be able to. But for some reason, God is taking us down a different path to parenthood, and we are excited about where HE is leading us.

Here is what our time line looked like:
May 2008 - May 2010 - Try to get pregnant on our own, not working for us! 
May 1, 2010 - Decided to stop trying, do not seek medical help and pursue Adoption!
May 11th - Information meeting at Night Light Christian Adoptions
May 14th - Met with Special Link Adoptions - Decided to work with them
May 18th - Mailed our application to Special Link.- Homestudy scheduled for June 18th. Started the paperwork for our homestudy.
June 8th - Got an e-mail from our agency about a possible situation but we needed to move up our homestudy.
June 9th - Homestudy
June 13th - Homestudy officially approved.
June 25th - Got the CALL! A birth mother has chosen us to be the parents of her baby boy due August 10th
August 7th - Baby boy born!
August 8th - Phone call telling us the baby is here, now the wait for TPR starts
August 14th - Waiting period is over, and he is all ours! Pick him up!
December 15th - Adoption Finalized in court


As you can see, we had a super fast adoption. Everything went so smoothly, and fell into place so perfectly, we knew that God was definitely in control!

Click here for every blog post I have written about Adoption.

In November 2014, we started the adoption process again! And in April 2016, we finally welcomed home our second son! His adoption is way different then Michael's was, but just as equally amazing!

Here is what our timeline to Baby J looked like:
Sunday, November 23, 2014
Andrew says he is ready to move forward with adoption #2

Monday, November 24, 2014
Contacted DSS, forwarded to Heartfelt Calling. Was emailed the application packet.  Filled out the application. 

Tuesday, November 25, 2014
Mailed application! 

December 8, 2014 - Spoke with our case worker at DSS about orientation. Signed up for January class. 

January 26, 2015 - Orientation in Grenville at DSS office. Got application packet. 

January 28, 2015 - Andrew physical & TB test, Katie TB test, dropped off medical paper at Michael's doctor to be filled out, Molly shots

January 29, 2015 - Finger prints done in Greenville. Sent electronically to DSS

January 30, 2015 - Katie TB test read, Andrew TB test read. Both negative

February 14 & 28 - All day training

April 18 - Adoptive family training DSS office. 

April 18 - turned in all of our paperwork at DSS office

...WAITING...

October 28, 2015 - Got an email from our new case worker. We have been assigned to a Certified Investigator (CI).

October 29, 2015 - DHEC inspection requested. 

November 12, 2015 - got phone call from CI, Set up homestudy visit. 

November 17, 2015 - Fire inspection. PASSED!!

November 20, 2015 - Homestudy visit

November 30, 2015 - Second homestudy visit

December 11, 2015 - Got email from our CI, she is finished with homestudy and sending it in to DSS. 

December 15, 2015 - Write an email about DHEC inspection. Still not scheduled. Was told they are behind. 

December 16, 2015 - I call DHEC and speak to someone about getting our inspection done quicker. She is going to write an email to the person who does the inspections to see what they can do. 

January 4, 2016 - Got a call from DHEC, inspection scheduled for January 20. 

January 20, 2016 - DHEC inspection. 

January 20, 2016 - Got an email from our new case worker. Need to update paperwork, sign new papers etc...

January 21, 2016 - Sent all paperwork back signed. 

January 24, 2016 - Sent Andrew's pay stubs and my 2015 babysitting income spreadsheet to case worker. 

January 25, 2016 - Got our homestudy to review from our CI

January 26, 2016 - sent notes on homestudy back to the CI.   

February 2, 2016 - Molly updated shots. 

February 2, 2016 - Got approval letter from case worker. 

February 4, 2016 - Went to the DSS region 1 adoptions office to review and sign official homestudy. We are officially approved to adopt!!

April 4, 2016 - Got a phone call about a 1 year old baby boy. Said Yes! Will have a meeting on Wednesday to go over all the details. 

April 6, 2016 - 9:00 meeting at the DSS region 1 adoptions office. Went over all the information for Baby J! Signed our intent to adopt him!! Had to apply to be foster parents, since he is not legally free for adoption yet. Filled all of that paperwork out. 

April 7, 2016 - Foster license paperwork filed. 

April 15, 2016 - Told Michael he was going to be a big brother. 

April 16, 2016 - Met Baby J at his current foster parents house.

April 17, 2016 - Michael got to meet Baby J! Picked him up from foster parents at lunch. Went to a playground. Brought him back to the foster parents at the soccer field. 

April 18, 2016 - Baby J Day!! Picked him up from the foster parents house, and brought him home!

Now we wait for all of the legal stuff to get done. And then we can have our adoption finalization!!
Click here for all of my blog posts about our Foster to Adopt journey.


If you have any questions, just ask!

1 comment:

linda said...

very informative !!! God's timing is amazing !!